Maybe we're better off apart (but that's a lie)
by jnicweb
Summary: The way love works is never easy to understand. They know this better than most.


**Alright, so the set up on this is really strange; Fanfiction wasn't keeping my spaces between lines, so I put zero's instead. The point of them is to just differentiate between the scenes I pulled quotes from.**

 **These things are never easy.**

 **Nothing ever is.**

Being with the one you love always has its ups and downs. It is like a roller coaster ride; with the twists and turns and loop-da-loops. You never know what you're going to get, or where you're going to go. Sometimes that kind of spontaneity a good thing. Other times, it's kind of inconvenient.

* * *

 **Apart**

A good plus to staying apart is the way I never need to worry about saving his life. If he's away, I can just focus on myself, and saving my skin. But then I always worry about what he's doing, and wondering if maybe he needs me. And somehow that's worse than worrying about his skin next to me. I'd rather be looking out for him standing next to me, not on the other side of the world, wondering if he's okay.

* * *

 **Together**

When we're together though, that's a different story. We are bombs, waiting to blow up at one wrong word from the other. We are so sensitive to each other it's scary. If he says one thing that I don't agree with, I will cease speaking to him for the rest of the day. And if I say something he doesn't agree with; let's just say that divorce exists for a reason.

* * *

 **We are always yearning for each other.**

But it hurts so much when he's gone.

* * *

 **Longing for the embrace**

I sometimes wish that I had never joined SHIELD. Then we wouldn't have these trust issues. We would probably still be married, and my biggest problem would be how to extract him from the bar. It would be nice if life was that easy.

* * *

 **that greets lovers**

We would be together, with nothing in between us. It would be perfect if I didn't have a need to save people who can't save themselves. Unfortunately, things are not that easy.

* * *

 **whether we are good for each other or not.**

He kind of makes me crazy. And sometimes I make him crazy too. And that's surprisingly okay.

* * *

 **Sometimes I think**

 **about what it would be like if I had never known him.**

My life would be even simpler if he was not even in it though. I would never need to watch what I say, or control myself from doing reckless things, knowing that there is someone I have to get home to. There would be no need to worry about him, or think about him, or be distracted by him.

* * *

 **And then I laugh**

 **because my life would be a whole lot more boring**

 **without his**

 **laughter**

 _I can't argue someone to suicide._

 _-Clearly you've never had an argument with yourself, then._

* * *

 **sarcasm**

 _But you should both focus on not saying anything overly stupid._

 _Yes, ma'am._

 _-I'm not making any promises._

 _00000_

 _-Deception's her forte. Uh, I-I mean that sincerely, not passive-aggressively. As in, it's a good attribute for a spy to-Bloody hell._

 _00000_

 _-Is every RadioShack a HYDRA outpost?_

 _00000_

 _-What did you do, come on too strong? Subtlety is key._

 _You were dressed like a cowboy!_

* * *

 **quiet brilliance**

 _-Join S.H.I.E.L.D. Travel to exotic distant lands. Meet exciting, unusual people... and kill them._

 _00000_

 _-Maybe we should forget all this, head down to Mexico…_

* * *

 **calming words**

 _-So that's what this is about; you guys don't want Coulson in charge. I'll be the first to admit the guy's not perfect. Sometimes chews with his mouth open, tends to hog the mic on karaoke night. But other than that, he's not so bad really._

 _00000_

 _I thought you were dead!_

 _-You can't get rid of me that easily Bob._

* * *

 **encouragement**

 _-Don't die out there alright?_

* * *

 **and most importantly**

 **his presence.**

He makes me feel safe. And I think that's important in a relationship, but people don't really care about those kinds of things any more. I know that he's got my back, no matter what happens. And that counts for a lot in this kind of work.

* * *

 **He makes me**

 **whole**

 **special**

 **confident**

 **me.**

 **We complete each other.**

I don't really know who I would be without him. For one, I would have no one to put me in my place if I do something stupid. If I did something that would endanger people's lives, he would stop me. And I have to be kind of grateful for that. He always reminds me of why I became an agent in the first place. Also, I kind of love the way he pretends that he's capable of thought. I mean, he's a complete idiot who can't control what comes out of his mouth; he has no filter. But it's cute when it backfires and he says something that he probably shouldn't have.

* * *

 **But I would be better off without his**

 **mistrust**

 _-It didn't work out because inter-species relationships are hard. I was a human, whereas she was a demonic hell-beast."_

 _00000_

 _Everything I felt for you, that was real.  
-Yeah maybe so, but in the end you still got that intel didn't you?_

 _00000_

 _Will you ever trust me?_

 _-I'll never stop wanting to._

* * *

 **drinking problems**

 _-Well, I happen to appreciate your instinct to be thorough. I myself prefer a pint and a good nap. But, then, I'm the lazy type."_

* * *

 **tone**

 _Nice suit._

 _-Nice suit? Really, that's what you're leading with? What did you do to your hair?_

 _Ever heard of undercover?_

 _-I prefer you blonde._

 _Well, I didn't do it for you. Two seconds in and there's already a tone._

 _-This isn't a tone. This is my speaking voice when I'm upset with an unreasonable person._

 _00000_

 _-Tiny violins playing. No one's listening sweetheart._

* * *

 **recklessness**

 _-Taking a bullet for me was stupid._

 _Walking into a trap when you know it's a trap is stupid._

* * *

 **Maybe we're better off apart**

 **but that's a lie.**

He really is the most insufferable moron who has ever walked this earth. But I love him, no matter his faults, or issues.

* * *

 **He makes me**

 **who I am.**

 **And I can't hate that.**

 **No matter how much I try.**

 **0000000000**

 **Let me know what you think!**


End file.
